#84 Will McGlynn
Nickname: McChicken, Glen
Dating Status: Taken
“This frisbee shit is so easy,” McChicken® says as he takes a bite out of his Jimmy John’s Ultimate Porker® sandwich.
Despite never having played in high school, William “Glen” McGlynn’s freak-athleticism and one year of experience with the prestigious New Jersey DeVYL ultimate program made for an easy transition to the frisbee field. From day one, William “Glenjamin Franklin” McGlynn was harvesting ankles, launching 70-yard nukes, and roofing defenders. Even when matched up against veterans on the team during practice, William “Glennifer Lawrence” McGlynn found it easy to dominate:
Overheard on the sideline after practice on October 4th, 2022:
This year looks to be an especially great one for William “Glenzel Curry” McGlynn. Looking to lead En Sabah Nur to their third ever national championship, William “MacGyver” McGlynn knows that the big aspirations the program has set for itself are within reach.
“No one can stop me. I’m literally the best ginger who’s ever played for En Sabah Nur. Who’s Carl Morgenstern?”
Outside of frisbee, William “McMorgenstern” McGlynn purports to enjoy “doing stuff outside and cooking.” However, everyone knows that William “McGregor” McGlynn only does three things in his free time: tutor the rookies in chemistry, be a good father to Kevin, and eat McDonald’s. In fact, perhaps the worst-kept secret in all of Pittsburgh is that William “McGraw Hill” McGlynn is the only thing keeping the Forbes Avenue McDonald’s in business. Walk through the doors of the Golden Arches on any given day and you will likely find William “MC Glynn” McGlynn chowing down on a McDonald’s McChicken® and some french fries. When asked about his McDonald’s habit, he said this:
“You gotta stay hungry. Doesn’t matter how much you’ve eaten. When you’re in the pursuit of greatness, you can never get complacent. Through every victory and triumph, the real greats are the ones who are always grinding, always looking for that edge. Also, I always go for the two for three here because it’s one of the most economical options on the menu.”
William McGlynn. Remember his name.